The end of a Road Trip - the Start of something NEW

Dear Blog Followers,

THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT! We really appreciated the messages, comments and knowledge that you were reading.

(We know about you lurkers too – and it made us feel really cool to have so many people invested in our lives. It was like high school again)

A week has gone by since our road trip ended. Helen flew back in 6 hours what took us 39ish days to cross.

Where are the sisters now? Well, Maryanne has passed her CA driver’s test and is now a resident. Helen moved into a new abode. Maryanne went friend shopping at the Green Festival in SF. Helen has traveled to NJ, PA, DE, ML, VI, TN and NC – and now is in Flowery Branch, Georgia working.

Pretty much, our lives continue to be radical adventures.

We are unsure about what to do with this blog. Should we update it from time to time when our lives are EXTREMELY exciting? Should we allow it to sit, as a tribute to our first adventure across the entire USA? We are open to your suggestions!

Here is a map summary of our trip, it only includes dots for places we stayed. And obviously we didn’t travel straight lines through the country or swim Lake Michigan or Erie.

LOTS OF LOVE.
The Sisterhood of Helen and Maryanne

Day 38: Death Valley to Oakland, CA!

This was the last day of our journey…. we left our friendly campsite before dawn so we could do one final farewell hike together.

(Maryanne insisted on putting $5 worth of gasoline in the car, although Helen claimed it was a waste and rip-off at the 4.50 price. This is an important detail for later.)

DARWIN FALLS waterfall hike! There was truly water on this hike. Shocking. It was really beautiful to see a flowing fall, surrounded by vegetation so lush it was like a fierce jungle. All around the tiny steam there was an explosion of green, and then 5 feet away it was the dry brown desert “life” we had been seeing for days…

We found a strange bird and wondering if it might be a dodo. It really looked like the sketches in science books. Or at least the nerdy sister who recalled her 2nd grade book claimed.

After this hike, we crammed into the Bug for the last few hours of travel. We passed hundreds of endangered Joshua Trees and Maryanne insisted on stopping and celebrating these trees. She even pondered about getting one tattooed on the back of her neck.

Next we drove.
And drove.
And drove.
Maryanne asked Helen where the nearest gas station was and Helen said ten miles.
This turned out to be false.
The gas light came on.
Maryanne asked Helen to GPS the nearest gas station.
Again, another 15 miles and another empty gas station.
The needle went below the EMERGENCY WHITE LINE.
Maryanne coasted the car for as long as possible.
THEN, A GAS STATION! IT WAS MORE MIRACULOUS THAN DARWIN FALLS!
Her tank had .2 gallons left.

In much better spirits, the sisters continued onward. Bypassing LA’s smog and omigodness, we headed north toward the beautiful land of SAN FRANCISCO! We saw the gorgeous Sierra Nevada mountains, which looked bizarre because we were still in the desert looking at snow covered mountains. (Stare and wonder at the photo.)

After a few more hours, Maryanne’s city driving skills were tested and she successfully navigated to Fairfax Avenue, with TomTom’s help. The oldest sister had hung a sign in the front window, demonstrating why she earned the best blog follower announcement.

Day 37: Death Valley, California

Day 37 was our last DAY of adventures. We started with the Gower Gulch Loop hike, but expanded it by taking the interpretive trail. This 4 mile hike had 0 markers and about 12 side mines you could explore. Helen was unwilling to venture into dark holes in the side of mountains and Maryanne was afraid to go inside a cave where criminals could hide out and then murder you. Therefore, no mine exploration was accomplished. LAME.

The Devil’s Golf Course! It’s a large salt pan – the salt crystals are so rough there are signs warning that if you trip, your leg will burst into pieces and you will have to get it amputated immediately. “It was named after a line in a 1934 National Park Service guide book to Death Valley, which stated that "only the devil could play golf" on its surface.” Helen attempted a round of golf regardless.

Next we had the lowest moment of our entire lives. Loves and friends lost do not compare to how low we felt. It is a little personal, and the reason it took so long to post this entry….truly…this moment is the lowest either of us have ever been. To experience lowness of this degree together – well, that was something else. It was a real head shaking sorrow.

Badwater Basin is 282 feet below sea level, the lowest place in North America. It is also a salt pan.

We started to feel like we needed to see something besides salt, so we took the waterfall hike; except there was no water. There were just remnants from where water used to fall. This was faulty advertising. Who knew that “ancient” waterfalls actually meant REMANANTS?! When I hear about water, I expect some liquid! Not eroding rock from water gliding down in thousands of years AGO!

This disappointment was tempered by the natural bridge we came across! I guess people on a hike titled, “Natural Bridge Canyon” should expect this; however our faith in Death Valley was a little low from the H2O incident.

We had now hiked about ten miles and while Helen wanted to hike another trail, Team Realism’s President Maryanne Brown voted NO and stated that since it was 95 degrees outside she would have a party alone if Team Unrealistic went hiking.

Both teams joined together to DRIVE the 8 mile “Artist’s Drive.” THIS WAS SIMPLY AMAZING! The rocks were literally unnatural colors. Helen was able to do another short hike, while Maryanne watched the view change in the sunset while simultaneously not tempting death.

While heading back hungry, a sign for NAVAHO TACOS, was spotted on the side of the road. These delicious food was made in a trailer that was also someone’s home on the Indian Reserve located in Death Valley. These tacos alone make Death Valley putting on your life to-do list.

The last road trip day ended with a craft fair and hiding in a hotel until ready for bed.

The Changling

This is the saddest movie of all time. Helen cried so loudly that I was embarressed to sit next to her. It's a great movie- but bring a towel.

Day 36: Death Valley

According to Helen the tent heated up to 1000 degrees in the morning, but Maryanne thought it was freezing and snuggled in her sleeping bag as long as possible.

After another shared meal with Greg, we went to purchase lunch. Everything remotely healthy was disgusting – butter bread? Rotten apples? $6 sandwiches? No thanks. We settled for Wheat Thins and Kippers, pathetic, but hopefully something nutritional was sealed in the packages months ago.

Driving to our first hike, we stopped at the Devil’s Cornfield, which wasn’t very demonic or cornlike. In fact, it looked like everything else.

Then we went to the Salt Steam to see the pulp fish, but it wasn’t the right time of the year. We did get to see some jerks walking their dog through the oases, despite the signs CLEARLY stating no pets. Additionally their t-shirts expressed strong views, which is lame. I mean, if you were a t-shirt advocating something, know that your actions are doing more work than your garb and pretend you’re a decent human being for a day. Thanks.

WE SAW A TARANTUALA! Maryanne was driving 55 mph down the road and was able to spot this monster crossing the street. She slowed the car down safely and both Browns stared in disgust, it was MASSIVE and HAIRY!

Rhyolite is one of the best ghost towns in the world, according to the local area rumors and we thought it was very impressive. In four years this town was founded, swelled to 10,000 in population and then dropped to less than 600. Helen has now ruled out mining as a career choice due to its inconsistency.

In one section of the town artists can put up anything you want, so there was a real hodgepodge of strange statues. You could see The Lord’s Supper, a sad Jesus with two flat bike tires, a penguin, a mosaic couch and some things that cannot be easily described.

We celebrated the heat of this trip with DELICIOUS MEXICAN FOOD! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

Helen declared it the best fish taco ever. This says a lot because it’s all she ever eats.

Maryanne spotted a mine shaft on the side of the road and made Helen stop. It was very well hidden and dangerous, so both Browns stayed outside and looked in.

Whoooo – this day was awesome, because I am writing still!

We hiked around the outside of a crater created 2,000 years ago by a volcano! You could fall into the center and probably not emerge until it erupts again. Although this seems like a neat way to go, both sisters choose life.

NEXT we went to Scotty’s Palace. This is a tourist destination for people who come to Death Valley and don’t like nature. You can tour this Palace and see how a rich couple and their male friend live in the 1900s. We walked around outside and missed the imported mosaics, but SAW A COYOTE!!! First Maryanne saw a massive rabbit and shouted, “RABBIT! RABBIT! RABBIT!” Then Helen whispered, “coyote,” as the smaller-than-expected animal chased the rabbit!

The day ended with us sneaking into the nearby hotel lobby and using their internet and watching their TV. We are excellent!

Day 35: Las Vegas to Death Valley

Drove from Las Vegas to Death Valley and passed a sign that said, ‘Prison Nearby. Hitchhiker pickup is prohibited,”

Arrived in Death Valley, CA, but never crossed a state line sign!

Set up tent and had two people complain we had taken “their” spot – because they had seen it across the lot and wanted it. Suckkkkkkkkkkkers.

Our neighbor, Greg, was a 50 year old alcoholic without a fire pit, so we told him he could use ours.

Then we went to the nearby Sand Dunes – watch video!

Returned and Greg asked if he could join us for dinner because he was lonely. There were about 100 people at this campground, so we felt safe; plus he told us quality stores about his mining experience and girl friend in a mental hospital.

Later on, Helen and I were cold and not tired so we walked to the nightlife spot and shot pool and were given free drinks for being the only people under 30 to ever enter this establishment.

Day 33-25 Vegas!

Days 33-35: Jessica was a wonderful host. She is the embodiment of perfection and her crib is pimped out with delicious food, a pool and hot tub!

Day 36: OBAMA WINS! We had to leave the news coverage for 20 minutes to pick up Maryanne’s car. It was there that Obama WON! Maryanne was staring at Fox News when this occurred and was very joyous and celebrating. Unfortunately it turned out that the 10 people she was trying to celebrate with were all McCain fans. This was awkward.

Everything else stays in Vegas!!

Day 32: Kingman, AZ to Las Vegas

Unrealized to us, our route took us over the Hoover Dam. We stopped at this engineering marvel and stared at awe at all the foreign tourists. If I was coming to America, seeing the Hoover Dam would be very low on my list of highlights.

In Vegas we met a fellow non-victim of the trapped-in-NJ syndrome, Jessica Keene.

Most of what happens in Vegas will stay here, but sometimes we are too glorious to contain the excitement and we WANT you to be jealous.

Our first night started in The Palms, celebrity club hotspot. We cut off hip-hop mogul Shug Knight for a parking spot, skipped $800 worth of covers, took the secret VIP elevators to the Playboy Club, Moon and Rain clubs and saw the starter of techno DJ, Paul Oakenfold while rings of fire exploded around us.

Day 31 - Kingman, Arizonia

Couch surfing was taken to a new level on this day: four movies and two couches all day. We are becoming more extreme.

We had intended to leave that morning, but since the previous night had been so glorious, we decided to stay another night!

Our $5 budget for costumes made Helen an old woman and Maryanne a watermelon! We met SARAH PALIN that night!

After that anything we write is mediocre.

If you ever want to have the two most amazing nights for your life, stay with Tanya in Kingsman! She is outta of control generous and highly endorsed by us.

Day 30 - Grand Caynon to Oatman to Kingman

Thirty minutes away from Grand Canyon, we realized we had forgotten our sneakers! After this hour delay, we arrived at the Deer Farm to see a buffalo named Mary Ann! Maryanne was especially excited about this bison.

HOWEVER it turned out it costs 8.50 to enter the Farm, so we drove away. Seriously, we have seen more animals in the wild and the buffalo seen in SD have been renamed Mary Ann and Hellen to make up for any pain caused by this non-experience.

We then drove to Oatman, which is in Arizona as well. This city is a wild west town, with people in costume running around. We witnessed a gun fight and bar fights. Some cowboy had stolen another’s daughter and threatened to, “send her back screaming!” Ferocious.

(You can also get married here! The groom doesn’t show up, is dragged back by cowboys and chained to the alter, then another cowboy shouts that he opposes the wedding because he’s already married to the bride! That wench!)

The stores were named things like, “Fast Fannies,” “Glory Hole,” and “The Classy Ass.” And there were all sorts of ridiculous events, like bed races in January. Helen plans to return. AND there were wild burros roaming around.

This town had originally been a mining town, but after WWII, it became dead and has been reinvented by none other than, a MARS HILL COLLEGE ALUM!

OH YES! While getting ridiculous old time photos done, we talked to the guy taking the pictures. We soon learned that we shared an alma mater! He was about 70 and used to tease Ms. Virginia, our Sunday omelet lady! Everyone else was gone and he had attended MHC when it was a 2 year junior college.

And yes, he was now the start cowboy re-enactor and everything glorious about MHC put inside a human.

After celebrating ourselves and school, we drove on ROUTE 66 to Kingman!

Our host for the night, Tanya had just received her tax rebate and took us all out to celebrate and see the nightlife!